Bruces' Philosophers Song

The Philosophers' Drinking Song

Immanuel Kant was a real pissant
Who was very rarely stable.

Heidegger, Heidegger was a boozy beggar
Who could think you under the table.

David Hume could out-consume
Wilhelm Friedrich Hegel, [some versions have 'Schopenhauer and Hegel']

And Wittgenstein was a beery swine
Who was just as schloshed as Schlegel.

There's nothing Nietzsche couldn't teach ya
'Bout the raising of the wrist.
Socrates, himself, was permanently pissed.

John Stuart Mill, of his own free will,
On half a pint of shandy was particularly ill.

Plato, they say, could stick it away--
Half a crate of whisky every day.

Aristotle, Aristotle was a bugger for the bottle.
Hobbes was fond of his dram,

And René Descartes was a drunken fart.
'I drink, therefore I am.'

Yes, Socrates, himself, is particularly missed,
A lovely little thinker,
But a bugger when he's pissed.

 (au 402kB)Here's a sound file (au 402kB) if you want to listen to the Bruces' song.

The Hollywood Bowl live performance of the Bruces' song is on YouTube.

Composer: Eric Idle
Author: Eric Idle

First heard on Monty Python's Flying Circus
The Second Series (aired from Sep. 15, 1970 to Dec. 22, 1970)
Episode 22: How To Recognize Different Parts Of The Body.

Recorded 25 September 1970, Aired 24 November 1970 , Prod. #62027

Page created 6 November 1996 by Alan Keig.