Moving away from family

The back of a person at a busy airport, looking at the departures table

Three years ago, I moved interstate to start uni at 18 but didn’t have the best support from my parents.

As exciting as an impulsive decision might be, this is something I spent months preparing for, convincing my parents that this was the best decision for me, looking for accommodation etc. But, the emotions didn’t hit me until there was a week left till my flight. 

I felt a sense of guilt for leaving my parents behind. The weeks prior were spent by them convincing me to stay and me convincing them to let me go. After us arriving at a decision for me to move, I didn’t feel happy even though I was getting to do what I wanted. I felt guilty for having to persuade my parents, and started doubting myself, am I making the right decision? I thought that it would be an exciting new chapter of life for us but instead was filled with feelings of guilt and anxiety.

This self-doubt engulfed me for the next few days, my stomach dropped and I was consistently on the verge of tears. This couldn’t go on forever though, I had to muster up some strength and reframe my state of mind. I reached out to my friends and spoke about these feelings, they helped me realise the way I was feeling wasn’t so uncommon. They helped remind me of my aspirations and helped me stop being bogged down in negative emotions. Slowly, I regained my confidence, and my thoughts shifted: “I deserve to be able to carry out my own journey in life.” I spoke to them and reassured them that I’d be back to visit during the breaks and I’ll be in contact regularly. At the end of the week, it was time to say bye, but realistically I said “I’ll call you when I reach there.” I left finding solace in knowing that I wasn’t abandoning my family, I was simply continuing on my journey in life. Looking back now, I’m happy that I was able to work through those difficult emotions to support myself in making this decision.

Tagged in What messes with your head, moving house, anxiety